Lilith

Black Swan - Following Lilith's Past Life Tracks

Today I share West's Black Swan Dreaming of her past life Lilith story. These stories are often keys that unlock the door we are craving to open to come home and be with others again, to be whole again in ourselves. Our Lilith stories are our memories of the Wild Feminine and how she became outcast - it is a story we often feel but find it hard to express in words. The Black Swan comes to journey with the Lilith story and it is her gift for story and words that help you to find your own mythic tale and the lyrics to sing back your long lost Wolf Sister.

Thank you West for sharing your heart and words, oceans of love to you and your wild sister as you journey together now. You can read more about these sessions here.

As the journey started I walked into the forest the green light blurred. I looked up, the foliage had disappeared and a thin green membrane was above me, held up by hundreds of solid black tree trunks that disappeared into the murkiness. I started to walk into the forest but as I walked, I moved backward; every step I took dragged me back. Eventually I was blown back and I realized that the forest I was in was actually a dragon’s eye. It was Lilith’s eye. The trees were veins and the green the membrane was her skin. As I realized this I tumbled out and came face to face with her.

Lilith had the most beautiful face. In fact, as I looked upon her I knew that there was no woman who would ever be as beautiful as her. Her features were long and elegant; dark eyes, soft lips and a sharp jaw. She wore a dark blue cloak. However, the longer I looked at her I started to notice her features were morphing; fading in and out. Lilith was a Shapeshifter. Sometimes I could see the bones clearly underneath her features. Her eyes became the eyes of a wolf. She had antlers, a horse’s mane and nose, paws with feathers and wings made of quill arrows – ready to fire at a moments notice. Her legs were that of a lion and her feet were those of an eagle; strong and sharp. Yet underneath all of these morphing animal features, the woman remained; composed and peaceful. I only ever saw the left side of her face, the rest remained in shadow. “That’s just how it is.” she said. “The darkness just is.” she said. “Forget the names of good and evil, forget the names of darkness and light. That is just how it is.”

As we walked she donned a giant wooden mask, half wolf and half horse. The mask was stylized, thick lines and blocks of colour – red, green, white and blue. She wore a cloak made of moss and sticks. She stalked like a shaman steeped with magic; dancing her way through the night. We were crossing a frozen tundra together. We were in the Arctic. There was an ice-wall ahead and the Aurora Borealis danced wild green above our heads.  She whispered that the Aurora Borealis were the ghost of the forests that had been. Suddenly the sky cracked and an ice-water waterfall flowed down; glacial shards piercing the tundra like flesh. The world peeled away. I found myself alone and looking in to a dark pool. The air was painful on my skin. Lilith was looking back at me from in the pool. I wanted to ask where she had gone; how had she got to the other side of the water? I missed her but I was scared. Suddenly, a white paw shot out of the water and dragged me down into the pool. The pool was a portal.

Once again I stood beside Lilith on the tundra however, I knew we were on the other side of the pool; like stepping through the looking glass, I guess. It was daylight now and the air sparkled with the cold. Looking up I saw we had broken the ice-wall. Just our presence changed things. Lilith was a Shapeshifter and Shifter of Shapes; a catalyst for change. Lilith and I walked on through the ice crevices. I marveled at the whites and blues. The next thing I knew I was looking down at a grave; my grave from a past life. The grave was open and it was all bones and dirt and a mess of long black hair. Some of the leather clothing remained but it was stained red. I looked down at the broken and dry bones with curiosity and compassion. Lilith stood beside me in reverent silence but I could sense her silent howls. She wanted me to get going. What was I to get going on? I looked down at the bones of the young girl’s hands, my hands, they were clutching a brilliant ruby red heart. If you caught the heart in the right light you could see a foxes face in the ruby. 

I looked behind me, rows of Polar Bear Clan people and polar bears stood watching from afar. Some turned their faces away. A great sadness resonated through the crowd, only the bears stood strong. This Wildling girl had been of the Polar Bear Clan. There had come a time where in order for the clan to survive, to assimilate to the new ways, the Clan had needed to freeze and hide the magic. The girl was furious. I was furious. Lilith was furious. How dare they deny us? I ran. I took the magic with me. I dug my own grave with blooded hands. I froze myself along with the magic. I would not breathe without the magic. So, there I lay for thousands of years, talking to the dirt about death. I listened to the poetry of the fallen hearts rumbling in the soil. Gods came and went. I learned how nothing ever ends, just transforms. All transformations are magic. All transformations are sacred. Dirt is sacred for it transforms, and magic never leaves us, it just waits...

I snapped back out of my old life. Once again I was looking down at the bones. Lilith and I started to breathe life in to the skeleton of my old self. The wilding started to take form, wrapped in furs and weapons. We helped her stand, her eyes frantic. I held her tight, I kissed her bloodied knuckles, her blood was my blood, was Lilith’s blood. I and lent the wildling my warmth. A pack of wild beasts huddled around us; their fur keeping us safe. Lilith leaned in and with her bite, the Wilding was healed – the shock of pain telling her: “You are alive, even in death, you live on.”

Once she was warm I looked down to discover my abdomen was cut wide open and I was bleeding black. I was bleeding Lilith’s blood. This is where Lilith raged through. I was bound to this beautiful Wildling Girl with black dripping seaweed that came from this wound. The Wildling raged and tugged, she wanted to be free to run. I was in pain and my chest ached. I was guided to turn to Lilith for a sharp tool to cut the seaweed binds. However, Lilith handed me a duckling. The duckling ate the seaweed and grew into a large adult black duck. The duck waddled around my wounds, healed them and then waddled off… just doing what a duck does. “Beasts just are as they are.” Lilith said. “Never, never underestimate their medicine, no matter the form… no matter.”

Once I was healed I came face to face with my Wildling Self. Lilith watched over us as we stepped into one another and merged – becoming one. In the background was my Polar Bear Clan, they just watched. I loved my Polar Bear Clan but I could never return. I was too different. I needed to find my own clan. I needed to run wild. I needed balance of togetherness and aloneness. I could not pledge to any person. However, the Polar Bear Clan had promised to always protect me from a distance. Their protection and power echoed down through history affording me great strength and safety. I was marked with the paw. This taught me about forgiveness, letting go, and love.  

I had a sudden feeling of being home. My whole body relaxed... she was home. We were home; the medicine of death, of threshold and transformation, wildness, and creation shining brilliant in my heart, Lilith at my side ready to return. And so the next journey begins – to know my medicine, to honour it well, and to be with others when the time is right while taking the time to hibernate with my beasts, the bones, and the soil when needed… and to run thresholds…  to celebrate the my darkness, to realize and embrace myself and embrace Lilith.

Mabel Juli and her Moon Dreaming

The winner for the Kate Chaillis RAKA Award 2013, Mabel Juli.
Mabel Juli with her painting Garnkeny Ngarranggarni (Moon Dreaming)  Photo Eddi Jim
I have been swimming deep in the mysteries of Lilith this past month especially after the ceremony we held at the Magdalene Laundries. And so many sisters have been coming to me to journey to their own past life Lilith stories and wound to clear and release the bindings from it.  Lilith as been showing her face to me everywhere I turn.
And I saw her here too in Australia when I was drawn to the Dreamtime painting Moon Dreaming by Aboriginal artist, Mabel Juli. Mabel's painting recently won the Kate Challis RAKA Award and is part of the current exhibition: Under the Sun showing in Melbourne at the Ian Potter Museum of Art. 
I have been fascinated by this beautiful painting, so minimal and yet so potent. I see such a similarity to the astrological symbol of Black Moon Lilith. Even the Dreamtime story has many Lilith undertones and themes:
''The moon as a man went hunting kangaroo, and left his wife and mother-in-law at home in the camp. When he came back he saw a woman with her long hair hanging down. It was the mother-in-law and he wanted to marry her; he didn't want his wife any more.''

The people of the camp told him to leave and to take his ''right-way wife''. As he walked, the moon turned and cursed them, telling them they would die, while he would return each month.' Mabel Juli


Read more: http://www.smh.com.au/entertainment/art-and-design/shining-light-on-the-dark-side-of-the-moon-20130814-2rwur.html#ixzz2jAU2BV00

Embracing Our Lilith Stories

Yesterday we gathered in Sherbrooke Forest to create a circle of magic and love to hold and embrace our own Lilith stories. Such beautiful stories they were, full of courage and honesty and wild beauty. Thank you to all of the sisters who joined us in the green heart of the forest, I feel such excitement to know you and see you embrace your own outcast sister, holding her to your heart once more.

The Lilith circles are limited to 13 women to ensure that we can journey deeply. For the sisters who missed out on a place, I will be holding this circle again on Saturday 9th November at Kumbada Studio in the Dandenongs.

Initiate yourself

Dear Woman 

Woman,
You belong to the night.
You have blood on your thighs
and fuhrze in your hair.
You smell of loamy fertile soil.
Your breasts give life,
Your sex is a mystery school
leading to the holy of holies.

Turn your eyes inward.
Use owls' vision to see where you come from.
Slip beneath the surface,
and feel yourself become full.

Make a marriage to the moon.

Divorce the false gods of intellect and reason.
Find meaning in your dreams.
And in the secrets of your body.

Follow no authority -
But your own true nature.

Make a sacred fire.
And throw on it all that you would use to harm yourself.
Make kindling from shame.

Let your dance be wild.
Your voice be honest.
And your heart untamed.

Be cyclical.
Don't make sense.

Initiate yourself.
Initiate yourself.

Aisha Wolfe 
Yoni verse Burlesque
Here is a Lilith doll I created at midnight on the eve of holding our circle. 
She has the medicine of the beautiful Tawny Frogmouth, plants and herbs in her belly.
Lilith Spirit Doll - Embracing all parts of ourselves
Tawny Frogmouth Medicine

Unveiling Lilith - Aisha Wolf

I have just discovered this potent poem by Aisha Wolf - beautiful TRUTH! I feel such synchronicity here as we open the dreaming well of Femmina Unbound - Medicine Women Return for the collective healing of ourselves and the sisters of the Magdalene Laundries at Abbotsford Convent. SHE is stirring, she is rising, she is unveiling...

Dear Woman 

Woman,
You belong to the night.
You have blood on your thighs
and fuhrze in your hair.
You smell of loamy fertile soil.
Your breasts give life,
Your sex is a mystery school
leading to the holy of holies.

Turn your eyes inward.
Use owls' vision to see where you come from.
Slip beneath the surface,
and feel yourself become full.

Make a marriage to the moon.

Divorce the false gods of intellect and reason.
Find meaning in your dreams.
And in the secrets of your body.

Follow no authority -
But your own true nature.

Make a sacred fire.
And throw on it all that you would use to harm yourself.
Make kindling from shame.

Let your dance be wild.
Your voice be honest.
And your heart untamed.

Be cyclical.
Don't make sense.

Initiate yourself.
Initiate yourself.

Aisha Wolfe 

from my book Yoni verse Burlesque
William-Adolphe Bouguereau (1825 – 1905)

Welcoming the Dark Sister - Embracing Black Moon Lilith

The first of the Black Moon Lilith Illumination workshops has already filled within a week, showing me just how necessary and needed this beautiful shadow work is for us at the moment. For those of you who missed out on a place, I will be holding the next workshop on the Dark Moon in Gemini on Monday, 18th June. Please contact me with your birth details if you feel called to explore this illuminating work.

At this time of the rise of the Divine Feminine we are asked to illuminate the shadow aspects of lives to bring these 'orphaned' or 'outcast' aspects of ourselves into the luminous circle. Once embraced and loved they begin to become powerful traits and treasured gifts.

In this small and personal workshop held on the Dark Moon in Gemini a time when we can receive messages from our 'twin' or 'other' self, we will discover through Astrology where our Black Moon Lilith  resides in our Natal Chart. Through the ancient symbols of the Tarot we will find a language to help us to delve into the Deep, the Unknown to recover, honour and welcome every part of ourselves. It is time to reclaim the wise woman, the shamaness, the wild creatures. It is time to express our True Nature.

8 places available: please contact Julia with your birth details.

Black Moon Lilith

Thank you to all of the beautiful, truthful and inspiring women who shared the Black Moon Lilith Retreat with me over the weekend. It was truly an honour to be in your presence.
The retreat was held in all ways in the wise arms of astrologer, Babula Clement of www.newdawnastrology.com.au and beautifully assisted by my dear friend Mikailah Gooda and Lisa Edgerton. Words will do no justice... I thank you.